Strange Thoughts

Since I have no life this weekend, or should I say no social life because I'm not having such a bad time doing nothing after a long week of uni assignments and work, I'm going to write in here.

I'm not too good at articulating things so I'll be jumping from one topic to the other. I have difficulty in making my entries flow from one thing to the next. Hope it doesn't ruin reading my entries too much.

Anyway, I was going to say that sometimes before I go to sleep, I start thinking really strange thoughts like if, for example, April and Amelia, were falling off a cliff and I could only save one, which one would it be? I'm strange, I know. So I keep thinking of all the people that are really important to me and rank them in order of importance. Why the hell do I do that?! It really scares me, especially when I can't chose and I always make the choices really hard. At the top of my list is my Mum and Andrew. Choosing between them drives me crazy. I have to tell myself that it's very unlikely that I'd have to choose between them since it's very unlikely for them to be falling off a cliff while holding my hands. I'm so weird sometimes that I even scare myself.

When I was in year 5/6 and really didn't like my class, I'd daydream about the end of the world and that some force would tell me that I can choose 2 people to save and I imagined who that would be and the looks on my classmates faces when they weren't chosen.

I wonder if there's some deep unconscious psychological reason for these thoughts or if the part of my brain that controls my imagination has gone all weird. Probably both.

Does anyone else have any really strange thoughts that come out of nowhere?

Good vs Bad

I've borrowed "Chicken Soup For The Soul" because I've heard that it's good. It's a collection of apparently true inspirational stories. Although it's a bit setimental at times, it's still quite interesting. It's supposed to encourage faith in humanity which is good and all but it's a bit too mushy for my liking.

It actually made me think that if someone is unhappy with their life because he/she knows that it can be better, does that make them an optimist or a pessimist?

It reminds me of what my Dad said, "A pessimist says that life can't get any worse and an optimist says that yes it can".

I know there's too much cynicism in the world and a brighter outlook on life wouldn't hurt but why can't everyone just be realistic and realise that there is both good and bad. It's all balanced. Sure it'd be great if everything was great but it doesn't work that way. I wonder if it's possibe to eliminate the bad with time but I guess for that to happen, everyone has to agree about what's good.

My idea of good is when you can do whatever you want without hurting anyone else.