Relationships

I’m going to Nadine’s party tomorrow night. The one that all her friends are going to. I have a bad feeling about it but it’s probably just nervousness at the thought of being around lots of very loud people. I know that if I won’t go, I’ll regret it. Here’s my chance to meet new people, although I think I’ve met most of them before and didn’t particularly like them. It’d be good if my friends could come but if they will, I know I won’t talk to anyone else.

I talked with Nadine on the phone for a couple of hours tonight. It was weird. We fully talked about things that we used to talk about when we were close, i.e. guys, friends and relationships, not general stuff that we talked about lately (although we can talk about general stuff for hours too).

She told me about how one of her friends (I think I mentioned Netta before), who is about 25, and really wants to get married and have kids, is really good friends with a guy (who’s perfect for her) but doesn’t want to go out with him because she “doesn’t want to ruin the friendship”. That kind of reason irritates me so much!!!! It would be perfect to have a relationship with someone who you’re best friends with. Can’t people just get over their “Dawson’s Creek” melodrama?!!! Arghh!!!

Nadine offered to find me a guy. I told her not to, although I didn’t mean it. I’m just worried that she’ll embarrass me. I asked for her to find a guy for April. It’s less embarrassing to ask her to find guys for my friends, rather than for myself. I’ll have to ask her again. I should be beyond embarrassment. If she knows someone for me, then why not? Right?

Sometimes I wonder how Nadine and I became such good friends in the first place. We’re complete opposites, yet I can talk to her, like I can talk to April. Although we keep drifting apart sometimes, we always drift back again.

April came to uni with me on Thursday. That was totally cool! She needed to use my uni’s library so while I had the lecture, she went there, and then we caught the train back home. It was almost like school.

In my web design class on Wednesday, there are two girls who always giggle together about not very funny things and the tutor said they act like sisters. That made me miss April heaps ‘cause we were like that at school. All the teachers (and students) always associated us together. Once at a parent teacher interview, my teacher told my Mum that I got the similar marks as April, as if my Mum wanted to know how April went.

On the train, people turned around because we were laughing so loud and having a conversation that made no sense to anyone else 'cause we abbreviate some words (that we use all the time) e.g. SCG (smart cute guy) and some others so our conversation is all coded.

Sometimes, though, I’m glad that she doesn’t go to my uni because out of all my friends, she’s the one that I’d keep in touch with no matter how far we were, and if she went to my uni, I’d probably end up hanging out with her all the time.

On Wednesday, I found out that the baby-faced guy (that I mentioned before) catches my train. I think he recognised me. He’s not that baby-faced actually. He was quite all right though. I didn’t talk to him though. Did you think I would?!

Today on the train I saw this guy who was so absorbed in a book that he looked really cute. He looked like Rodin’s sculpture “The Thinker” with a book (and clothes). I came up with the following scenario that would be nice if it happened:

I see the guy, reading a book that I want to read but can’t find anywhere. I come up to the guy and say: Oh my gosh! Where did you get that book?!! I’ve been looking for it EVERYWHERE!

The guy: I got it as a present. Would you like to borrow it?

Me: Could I?!

He gives me his phone number so I could call him when I’ll be finished with the book so I could return it. We then meet up so I could give him back the book. We discuss the book and mention another book (that one of us has). So the other one asks to borrow it. So we keep meeting up to discuss books for a while and then decide that we like each other so much that we stop talking about books and talk about other things too.

Yes, this is how I entertain myself on the train. Don’t laugh!

Max messaged me. I don’t know what to do about him. Alice (a girl at Nadine’s family birthday party) said a very smart thing. She said that the most important thing about liking guys is not to obsess over them.

Just had a talk with Mum about getting married. I think she used to go out with a guy like Max. The weird thing was that she wouldn’t tell me how they met. Sound familiar?!!! The guy even proposed to her, but she decided that she couldn’t live with him for the rest of her life, although he was a really nice guy.

I’m going to meet Max soon. I’m serious. I know I’ve been saying it for a while but it’s been a bad time.

I asked Mum if she ever went out with a guy who she knew she had no future with and she said that she did when she had no one at the time. Poor guys!

I’m turning out to be like my Mum. That’s scary!

I was also saying that looks matter and she said that although they do, if you love a person you won’t notice his looks. I can understand that but looks matter before you get to love a guy.

She said how when at her work Christmas party last year, one of her colleagues said that she couldn’t believe that such a good looking woman had a not so good looking husband! My Mum said that the woman is completely stupid. My Dad isn’t even that ugly. It’s just my Mum is really pretty. She’s not like a model but her face is like an actress. I don’t really look like my Mum, unfortunately, although some people say I do. I think I look like my grandma (when she was younger!)

I’m so curious now about how my Mum met that guy who proposed to her. There was no internet then. And she said that she met him herself, i.e. no one introduced them. She must be embarrassed about it, even though so many years went by. I’m so curious now! I think if I married Max (which by the way will never happen), I’d tell my kids how I met him, even though I’m embarrassed about it now.

Anyway, I blabbed on enough for tonight.