Don't Take My Sunshine Away

I'm speechless, confused, annoyed, frustrated, insecure, paranoid, suspicious, worried, nervous, anxious, scared, upset. Sometimes David drives me crazy. And not in a good way.

In a relationship, I don't want to worry that any second my boyfriend might do a 180 degree turn and everything will collapse. I like having the security of knowing that my happiness will not suddenly disappear.

You always hear of those couples where "everything was going so well until one day he/she just left". I don't want to be one of those.

And I never had reason to get worried. Until today. Don't want to go into details but David's insecurity is driving me up the wall.

He makes no sense. There's no logic in the following (said in matter of minutes in between each):

"I think you like me more that I like you and I get worried that I don't like you as much"
"I don't think you want to be with me all the time and that makes me upset"
"For a moment I wondered what it would be like to be single"
"You're the best thing that ever happened to me and I don't want to lose you"

If he freaking doesn't like me as much as I like him, why would he care if I want to be with him all the time? And if he's wondering about being single, how could I be the best thing?

He said, "I'm telling you all this as a friend because you're the only person I can really talk to". Easy to say but I'm more than his friend and how can I not take it personally? How can I listen to him say how he's only 80% sure about whether he wants us to work and not get emotional? That's not how it is.

I told him exactly what I thought, as a 'friend'. He said he doesn't want to break up and those were just thoughts running through his head and he loves me blah blah blah.

I don't know what the hell is wrong with him but it's making me too damn insecure about everything that means the most to me.