Attraction and Doubt

So we didn't end up going out tonight. Ria's car got hit so she couldn't come. Ryan didn't want to get the train and the other guy wouldn't come without Ryan so David and I decided to cancel. It was weird cancelling on April since I don't remember doing that to her before. Felt bad but there was nothing I could do. Imagine her going out to a bar/club with David and me.

Instead, David came over and we watched Fiddler on the Roof. My Mum saw the musical recently and liked it so much she got the DVD. While we watched, he asked me what names I'd want to name my kids and when I told him, he said he didn't really like them. I asked him the same question and he said he'd want to name his son after his Dad. I would have no problem with this if only his Dad didn't have such a horrible name. I tried to suggest similar names but he didn't like any of them. I got a little frustrated. Obviously it's not really a burning issue at the moment but I don't want to argue over what to name the kids. Why does he even care so much about that? The names I like are quite normal - easy to say, yet not too common. I keep thinking that I shouldn't worry about this yet but then I think, "I don't want to worry about it later either".

I'm starting to realise that we have a lot of different tastes (other than music). Is that a really bad thing?

It was good to see him. I just absolutely love it when he's around. Even if I'm doing other things. Like today, I was fixing my photo prints and sorting them into albums and it was so nice just to have him sit next to me and talk.

Was talking to my Mum last night and she told me that after a year I should start deciding whether I want to have a future with him because there was no point stretching things out. Easy to say but so hard in reality. I really don't think I'll know this after going out with him for a year. Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever know.

At times he bugs the hell out of me with his different way of thinking and a bit of enlarged ego and other times all I want is him. It's hard to even think of breaking up with someone who obviously cares for me and who's so much fun to hang out with.