Cleaning My Brain

Cleaning is a great distraction from constant sad thoughts. Actually that's the only time I'm motivated to clean. Today, I cleaned out one shelf that was filled with uni stuff and other papers that I didn't want to throw out in case I needed them. I've decided that since I didn't need them for a year, I probably won't ever need them.

As I was sorting out through the huge pile, I found a copy of a song with April's changed lyrics to suit our 'desperate for a boyfriend' states. I couldn't stop laughing. It's so ridiculous!

Good old times...

I'm so glad David is a kid at heart like me (and April). April's and my silly songs and games have been replaced with David's and my silly dancing and adventures. Yesterday when he came over after my interview and we were being very childish as usual, I said to him (not for the first time), "We're such kids!" To my surprise he replied, "I know. I wonder what kind of parents we'd make". I said, "The type who are more immature than the kids". He laughed and asked, "Are we going to embarrass them?" and I said, "No! We're going to be cool parents". But he was like, "Oh come on, it'd be fun!" I feel sorry for these kids already.

I had a lot of time to think today and I came to the conclusion that getting fired had some hidden benefits (other than not having to work in a horrible environment). It showed that David can be supportive in hard times too (something I might not have had the opportunity to see any time soon). He's not here just for the happy and fun occasions. I was really impressed with how he immediately came over to be with me (on Monday) even though he had to wake up at 3am the next day. It's hard to believe we've only been together for a bit over 6 months. I feel like I've been with him for years.

We're going to a POBian restaurant tomorrow. I've been promising to take him there for ages and we've planned to go this weekend a couple of weeks ago. Kinda a weird time to go right after I've been fired but I'm going to try and not focus on that. On Saturday he invited me to go to the aquarium with him, his sister and their grandma. I told him I didn't want to be in the way if he wanted to spend time with his grandma but he said, "You're never in the way". So I'm going.

On Sunday, my friends and I are having a small Christmas party so that should be fun. I'll have to tell the others about losing my job which is going to be a bit awkward but I'm sure they'll make me feel better.

I've already told April who keeps reminding me to focus on the fact that I have a supportive boyfriend. Which I am. Must remember that it's always easier to find a job (no matter how hard it seems) than finding a boyfriend.

Then there's David's work Christmas party. I told him I was planning on lying about being unemployed. As far as his workmates were concerned, I was still working at the publishing company. He said I could say whatever I wanted.

I'm thinking I might keep feeling sad this week to get it out of my system but next week I'm moving on. I will get proactive and call my temp agents so I could get some money while looking for a real job.

Being fired is not the end of the world.