What Happened To My Life?

Next week is going to be different.

First of all, I won't have Veronica to talk to and have lunch with anymore.

Secondly, my manager decided to delegate tasks more efficiently so I won't have to stay there till 7pm and barely have time for a lunch break (or any break for that matter). No more article writing for me, only designing graphics. I actually like writing and doing some research for them but I really just don't have the time to do them, as well as everything else.

Today, my manager asked me if I wanted to go for drinks with the others. I knew it would be great to socialise with people I work with but it would've been too wierd to hang out with a bunch of 30 to 50 year olds. And I was tired and didn't even know where they were going or how I was going to get back if it wasn't close to public transport. Hopefully I won't end up alienating myself.

I keep trying to spot a good time to ask him about opportunities for me stay on after my contract but he's always so busy. It's ok, I still have time.

My life feels so odd at the moment. Like it's not really mine. Uni feels like forever away and my life as a 'not yet an adult' is quickly slipping through my fingers. I spend most of my time at work. It's good that I can enjoy my job which makes things easier. On the weekend, I might see my friends, I might not.

Even though my life isn't that bad right now, I can't help but want something more. Yeah, a boyfriend would be nice. Since I can't get one, I end up dreaming of things that I can achieve, like travelling. Travelling is exciting, it's adventurous, it makes single life more meaningful. Or maybe it's just an excellent distraction.

My favourite part of my life right now is my dance course. I'm past halfway and Andy likes it enough to want to do the next one with me. If I stick with it for 2 years, I can reach the Advanced level. I think that class is the only time when I can truly enjoy myself without wanting a boyfriend. And it's the first thing that I've done with my brother outside of home. I like the times before and after class when we just chat or sit on the train, both listening to our music.