Re: Max

Sometimes it's hard to believe that Max is still present in my life. More like semi or even quarter-present (if not less), but anyway.

Sometimes I don't ever want to talk to him and other times I have nothing better to do. I look at the whole thing as such a game. I remember AGES ago when I told him that, he got really offended so I just don't mention it anymore.

In his latest email, he said something witty and funny and for a moment I totally forgot why I didn't like him. I have the biggest weakness for guys with a sense of humour. Give me a guy who can make me laugh and I'm in love. (Ok, that was a bit of an exaggeration but I had to make my point.)

Sigh.

In other news, I've started to ignore Tim whenever he's online. I think it's because I'm scared he might start to like me more than I like him. So dumb. My brain works in ways even I don't understand. Like I've told April, there's no limit to my craziness. I always find ways to act more insane.

In my last conversation with April, I've realised that I'm a commitment phobic and don't even know it. Because as soon as I think someone likes me, I start backing off (unconsciously). And I'm also ego-centric because I think guys like me more than they really do.

So basically I'm a ego-centric commitment phobic. Or as April put it - "A guy".