Totally Over It

Straight after the break-up:
Andy: this is such a bad time for her to break up with me
me: there's no such a thing as a good time to break up with someone [me being such an expert in these things]

An hour after the break-up:
Andy: I didn't even like her that much
me: so if breaking up was inevitable, might as well have it now and save any pain in the future

15 minutes later:
Andy: I don't get why religion matters now when she said it didn't before
me: she probably got influenced by her family
Andy: that's it! She wouldn't even tell her friends back home that she was going out with me because she said they would disapprove because I'm not Christian. It's all her friends' fault.
me: you don't want someone who gets influenced so easily by other people. It's not her friends' fault. It's like saying that if a wife cheats on her husband, it's the wife's boyfriend's fault.
Andy: it is!

15 minutes later:
Andy: before she left, she kept telling me that she would get really mad if I found another girlfriend while she was away. And she did call me the day after the formal because she was worried I might start going out with Jen.
me: you don't need someone that insecure.
Andy: I know! I'm actually happy now 'cause I can find someone who I actually really like.
me: there you go! You're free again to find any girl you want.

5 hours after the break-up (after getting back from his friend's house)
Andy: I can't believe how quickly I got over her!

30 minutes later:
Andy: Seriously, I can't believe how quickly I got over her. It hasn't even been a day!

1 hour later:
Andy: Can you believe I got over her so quickly?!
me: no

15 minutes later:
Andy: Isn't it weird that I'm over it already?
me: what's even weirder is that you can't get over that you got over her.

15 minutes later:
Andy: do you think it's possible for us to be friends?
me (the relationship expert): no, it'd be too awkward.
Andy: she'll be moving away anyway so we won't be able to have a relationship anyway.
me: didn't you say that you didn't like her?
Andy: I don't. I just went out with her 'cause there was no one better. I'm totally over her.
me: uh-huh.

I know he'll be over it when he starts uni and meets better girls.