My Rescuer from Self-Pity

Sometimes you need someone to tell you to stop feeling sorry for yourself. It helps so much more than any sympathy can ever help.

Example:

When I tell my Mum how bad I feel about not being able to find work, she looks sad and says, "I really don't know what to do. It's horrible. Just don't know what to do". That only depresses me more because she's just reinstating the helplessness of the situation.

When I was telling David today about feeling bad about not finding work, he said, "I don't like to listen to you whinging like that. And before you say anything, I know you just want to tell me how you feel which is fine but I already know that you feel stuck. Sometimes it's not your fault that you can't find work. Just keep trying. There are so many bigger problems than yours. People who really struggle. You have the choice to find a good job. Some people don't. Just be patient. You have no reason to be depressed about this."

Now, that actually made me feel better. He's right. I'm making this into a bigger problem than necessary. Kinda funny, I just realised that I told him the exact same thing when he was feeling bad about being behind with uni education and that he should already be working, rather than changing career paths. He's using my own advice and throwing it back at me. I've reached into his subconsciousness. Cool!

He said he'll call after work. It's so weird that even in the last few days he's been working all day, we've managed to talk twice a day. I don't know why I was thinking that he's getting sick of me if he's calling me in his every spare moment.

Random thought: David and I move to America together for 18 months where we both get great jobs.

Lately I've been wishing too much for David and I to live together. And even the rebellious thought of finding another guy disappears in an instant because I so don't want any other guy anymore. I thought I'd never know if I'd want to be with David forever, but now it's all I want.