Wanting the Rare

Last night I went to Christine's 'birthday drinks'. The whole night had Christine's every typical touch stamped all over it. From not organising the time, the location, the people to her usual oblivion of how things should be done. However, being such wonderful friends, we all turned up.

Of course April and I were the first ones there. As we were waiting, I felt someone behind me tug at my handbag. I thought it was either Amelia or Claudia letting me know their arrival. When I turned around I saw some poor and unkept looking woman who suddenly closed her eyes, put her bag in front of her face and quickly walked past us, giving me quick glances from behind her bag. I thought, "What a creepy weirdo," until April realised that she must've wanted to snatch something from my bag. She was obviously an idiot because the bag was so close to me, I could feel its every movement and there was no way she could've reached for the zipper without putting her arm under mine. Still, the experience creeped me out a little.

When the others arrived, I retold them the story and for the next hour, Amelia kept pulling on everyone's bags as a joke. When I decided it was some time for revenge, I gently pulled on her bag and she totally freaked out! It was so funny! I didn't expect her to think it was really someone trying to snatch her bag. She tugged on my ponitail. I said, "That really wasn't necessary," and she replied, "What do you expect a girl to do if you pull her bag?!"

After over an hour, we went into a little cosy piano bar which really gave an atmosphere of something sophisticated. There weren't many people there so it felt very intimate with our group taking up the most room. Like the other few people (middle-aged/elderly men and a couple of tourists) were only part of the interior.

I wished David was there, especially seeing Claudia and Mike so cosy together. April was in one of her occasional not so friendly moods. She was so harsh and displeased with everything. Couldn't talk to her properly. Had a nice conversation with Christine though, about her learning POBian. She was pretty good considering she taught herself from a website.

I told everyone I was planning on having my birthday in a POBian restaurant. I've been wanting to go for so long and it never happened. First, David and I were going to go alone but it's more fun in a group. Amelia was excited to go once I told her about all the cheesy cover songs they'll probably be playing.

I'm going to be 22 soon! I've had this blog for over 3 years now! That's so hard to believe sometimes. Three years of my life recorded here!

David called me at 11pm last night, after he finished work. He said it's only this week that he'll be working both morning and night shifts so he could get the money for his textbooks. I guess he organised himself pretty well with his uni timetable. He'll have time for paid work, volunteer work, studying and even some free time. It's going to be busy but manageable.

I will have to slot into Tuesday nights and Saturdays. I'm pretty happy with that. He added, "Plus any time we feel like seeing each other". Amazingly enough, that would be possible too, if he doesn't have a lot of uni work.

I really need to get my life in order. (And by that I mean get a proper job.) I've been almost on the edge of depression a few times this week because of helplessness in being able to find anything. If I can't do anything about it, there's no point getting depressed. Something has to come up, surely. No point wrecking my mental health in the meantime.

Claudia isn't happy with her new job. She's been made to fax for hours, buy lunch and do data entry. I knew I wouldn't be able to deal with the role, especially since you sign yourself off to it for 12 months. At least she gets to see Mike every lunch time.

April wasn't very empathetic about my trouble in finding a job. She just kept saying how happy she was to be doing law because there was an easy process in getting a good job. That would be like me saying, "I'm just so happy I have a boyfriend and don't have to go through your pain of being single". Not nice.

I've actually given doing law a thought since it was one of my career choices other than design. But it's not going to happen. After being creative for so long, I wouldn't be able to write essays and study the details of the law system. I guess it seems like a glamourous profession but in reality it's too dry for me.

I want to do something I can be really successful in, but at the moment there doesn't seem to be anything. Designing the magazines was the only thing I felt really appreciated for. But in the long run, those magazines don't make much difference in the world. Life would be just the same without them.

I probably have too high expectations for a career. Why can't I just settle for some boring admin work and be done with it?

I need to stop craving excitement and adventure in every day life because it very rarely achieves that standard. I'm always left disappointed.