High School Reunion

I feel so restless. This is what happens when you are busy for the first half of the day and then you're home by four with nothing to do.

Since today was the last day when I could sign my contract for the last film I helped out on, in case they sell it for lots of money and require to pay me. I wasn't even thinking of going since I only worked two days and I was sure I wouldn't be getting much anyway. When I read the contract, I had to reread the 'fee' that they decided on a number of times. Those two days of doing nothing but watch a film shoot (maybe giving someone a tissue if needed) was worth what I would earn in a week on a salary of a mid-weight graphic designer. When I told David, he said I should've worked more days. How was I supposed to know that a job that I thought was just a volunteer one would pay that much? I would've quit my temp one and did this one for the duration of the shoot.

Afterwards, I walked around the city for an hour, waiting for David to finish his shift. When I saw him coming towards me, he had the biggest smile which was adorable. We walked to his country's consulate because he had to get something. On the way, as I was telling him that my Mum worked nearby (and inside I was worrying that it would be too weird if she saw us holding hands), we saw his step-dad, who very rarely worked in the city. His eyes straight away went to our linked hands which wasn't as embarrassing as my Mum witnessing the same thing, but still kinda weird.

Then he had to go to the library where I saw two girls who I haven't seen since high school. We caught up a bit. I tried to make my temp job sound better than it was. After the library, David insisted on driving me home (which I knew he would). I tried to convince him that he really didn't have to but he was like, "I just want to spend some more time with you". His car was parked at uni so we went there.

As he was refilling his water bottle, Jacqui came up. I haven't seen her in years. Again, I tried to make my temp job into something it wasn't.

When I told David I used to hang around with her at school, he couldn't believe it because he saw her around all the time and apparently all the guys thought she was hot. It was weird to think of this girl as hot (even though I know she's pretty). Everyone at school always thought she was the most perfect person - nice, intelligent etc. and it used to bug me that even though she was all those things, I still couldn't be close friends with her. It was impossible to reach her beneath the sweet and friendly surface. So to know that she's just as popular with the guys is too much. How could anyone be so freaking perfect? When I used to ask myself if I was just jealous and wanted to be like her, I'd always decide that I don't really want to be perfect if I can't have all the deep and meaningful connections that come from being open and having unique quirks that all non-perfect people have.

In the car, David asked me how come I knew so many people but only hang out with a few. I told him that knowing and being friendly with people is one thing but actually finding deeper connections is completely different.

After uni, we drove to my house where we hung out for a bit until I made him go home (since separating is almost impossible because neither of us ever wants to leave). I always feel so empty when he leaves. Like something is missing.